Press Releases

Domestic Penguin Dairy Remains Only Tariff-Protected Source for Penguin Products 

April 19, 2025

While the global market for penguin-based goods has gotten tangled in another round of trade restrictions, Penguin Ranch LLC is proud to remind customers that our full product line—from Glacier Butter™ to Emperor’s Reserve™—remains 100% domestically sourced and 100% tariff-free.

Imported penguin goods from places such as Heard Island and McDonald Islands are currently subject to steep surcharges and complicated customs processing. Ours are not. Because we believe access to high-quality, ethically sourced, climate-conscious penguin products shouldn’t depend on foreign policy or shipping lanes.

Every product we make—be it Puffin Cream™, Ice Brined Cheese™, or Frozen Custard Eggs™—is crafted right here, under humane conditions in climate-controlled igloos, using local water, local labor, and penguins who voluntarily participate in enrichment activities.

We're not saying other options are unethical, unsustainable, or economically risky. But we’re not not saying it either. So if you care about your snacks, your supply chains, and your sanity, stick with the only penguin dairy that answers to you—not to offshore interests.

Penguin Ranch LLC Announces New Line of Penguin-Based Infant Formula

October 12, 2024

Montana’s leading provider of penguin dairy, Penguin Ranch LLC, is thrilled to announce the launch of Little Waddlers™, the first commercially available infant formula sourced entirely from free-range, hand-milked penguins. With its naturally cold composition and high DHA content, Little Waddlers™ is poised to disrupt the formula industry with its promise of unmatched freshness and peak penguin purity. "We believe the next generation deserves the same access to Arctic nutrition that our penguins do," said CEO Prudence Fairbanks. "This is a huge step forward for the dairy industry and flightless infant health alike."

Montana State Legislature Declares Penguin Ranch LLC ‘An Agricultural Wonder’

March 3, 2024

In an unprecedented move, the Montana State Legislature has awarded Penguin Ranch LLC the title of ‘An Agricultural Wonder,’ solidifying the company’s place in the pantheon of great American farming institutions. The resolution, passed with an overwhelming 97-3 vote, recognizes the company’s "pioneering spirit in the field of non-traditional dairy farming" and its "inexplicable but undeniable economic contributions to the state." Critics argue that penguins may not be legally classified as livestock, but supporters counter that "it’s better not to ask too many questions." The ceremony will be commemorated with the unveiling of a bronze statue of Augustus Fairbanks, mid-penguin wrangling, outside the Montana State Capitol.

Penguin Ranch LLC Introduces Climate-Positive Dairy Farming Initiative

June 15, 2023

In an industry-first, Penguin Ranch LLC has announced a climate-positive dairy farming initiative that promises to revolutionize sustainability practices in non-traditional dairy farming. By utilizing naturally occurring permafrost cooling systems, deploying solar-powered ice churners, and implementing carbon-negative snow filtration, the company has achieved an astounding net-negative carbon footprint. "We’ve always been at the forefront of sustainable frozen farming," said CEO Prudence Fairbanks, "and we’re excited to set the industry standard for carbon-neutral penguin dairy."

Penguin Ranch LLC Expands to International Markets with First Antarctic Farm

September 5, 2022

In a move that surprises absolutely no one, Penguin Ranch LLC has announced plans to expand operations directly to Antarctica, establishing the world’s first Antarctic dairy farm. The new facility, tentatively named Igloo Creamery, will allow for unprecedented freshness in penguin dairy products, reducing transportation emissions and providing jobs to local research station residents. "It just makes sense," stated CEO Prudence Fairbanks. "Our penguins will finally be able to experience the homeland their ancestors came from, and we’ll finally have an excuse to say ‘farm to glacier.’"